Life

Hello to all. I know it has been quite some time since I have posted. I am sorry. I hope that this finds everyone well. After what seemed to be an endless fight, I am finally feeling better. As you have read in my mom's post, sickness has filled my days and nights. I just couldn't seem to shake the awful feeling of weakness, tiredness, and exhaustion. I spent many nights in tears because I just didn't feel like I had the strength to go on, to keep fighting. I screamed at God. I was so angry about the relapse and all I could think was how unfair all of this was. One thing that God showed me through all of that was that I was right. I didn't have the strength to do this. To fight this thing on my own. I HAD to rely on Him and Him alone. He showed me that this trial is meant for more than my own spiritual growth but to minister to others and support others through their trials. I felt so unworthy and unprepared for such a task. I cried and cried...and then it was as if someone had wrapped their arms around me. I literally felt a comfort beyond any physical thing. It was a feeling of love and support. God lifted me up. He lifted my head and held me. I can't describe how amazing it felt. I just knew He would pull me out and through. I have been holding on to that. That I know is truth. My spirits are higher, but my blood counts are not. Please continue to pray for physical strength. I need it now more than ever. God bless. I love you all.