Unsettled

I'm so unsettled. My mind, my body, and my emotions. I just need something solid to hold on to. I turn to God and pray, but there is a frustration because I can't see Him. I can't physically be held by Him. I'm so angry and I just want this to be over. Oh, God I cry out to you. Hold your child. Please Lord wrap me in your arms. Give me the strength I need to carry on. It seems too hard to keep pressing on. It feels so overwhelming. Heal me Father God. I need You more than anything in this world.

Shocked

Hello, This is Brenda, Bri's Mom.

Friday afternoon the doctor told us the lab results and comparisons to Tuesdays lab and biopsy. Her white count had doubled in two days and her leukemia blasts were around 30%. I was shocked and just broke down crying as I asked does this mean what I think it does? The doctor said it is a very agressive leukemia with poor prognosis and we need to be just as agressive in treatment. He went on to explain what treatment should look like and to expect they may keep her in the hospital until transplant. Additionally, if all goes well without major complications the earliest time transplant is possible is four weeks. We are praying for the four weeks. As more info comes we will update you.

I just can't believe it.

By now I'm sure the majority of you all have received an email from my mom about the return of my leukemia. This insane turn of events has thrown me for some loop. I was admitted again to Emory University Hospital. This time for the long haul. I wasn't aware that I would be staying here for an extended amount of time. Over the next few days I will have more information I'm sure about what the time line is going to look like, but my doctor did say that they will most likely not be sending me back home. It could be six weeks before I get out of here. I will be posting things that I need or fun things I would want. Mostly I need and your prayers. This chemo that I am undergoing right now is taking full affect on my body. It causes me to be extremely tired and I am constantly worn out. I am so tired right now. I will finish with this tomorrow. Sorry for the short ending. Check out Isaiah 40:28, "Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom."